The Questions That Open Us
Conversations that Move Hearts and Minds
This edition is one of my ongoing reflections - from real conversations, lived moments, and the quiet shifts I believe are reshaping how we lead today and tomorrow.
I’ve always believed that the right question can open a room, a heart, or a mind.
Whether I’m spending time with a close friend, sitting around the dinner table with family, or coaching leaders, my instinct has always been to ask.
Over the years, I’ve seen how a single question, asked with presence and care, can shift the energy in a conversation. It’s what brings tears. It’s what brings laughter. And often (thankfully), it’s what brings the truth.
In this edition, I’m reflecting on what I’ve learned through my lifetime of asking and being asked. Because I truly believe that while answers are everywhere… the right questions? That’s where the magic lives :)
Reflections Shaping How We Lead
Great Questions Build Trust, Connection and Clarity: We often think intimacy takes time. But a well-placed question can accelerate it. Whether it’s with a client, a partner, or a teammate, a thoughtful question, asked with warmth, signals: “I see you. I’m with you.” It’s about being present. And the best questions I’ve received are generous. They invite someone to feel seen, to think more deeply, or to reveal something they didn’t even realize they were carrying. It’s how we shift conversations from surface to soul.
Questions Reveal the Fullness of People… and the Fullness of Ourselves: Every time I ask a question, I remember this truth: people are never just one thing.
A question can show you someone’s wisdom, their joy, their wounds, their curiosity. It helps people share the parts of themselves they don’t always get to express. And every time I initiate a question game, we might go from light laughter to deep emotion - within minutes.
And it’s not just about asking. Receiving a question with honesty is an act of bravery too. It’s an invitation to be witnessed. Questions make space for our wholeness. And wholeness is where real human connection lives.
Questions Slow Us Down - And That Might Be the Boldest Move of All: We live in a world that keeps accelerating. With AI generating ideas in seconds, endless tools promising answers, and more noise than ever, it’s tempting to rush through conversation too. To be impressive, efficient, done.
However, some of the most meaningful moments I’ve shared with people came from that pause - the moment after the question, when no one rushes in to fill the silence. That’s where trust grows. That’s where people feel something real.
Quotes I Keep Coming Back To
On the light inside the Question
“It is not the answer that enlightens, but the question.” - Eugene Ionesco
On Doubt as a Doorway
“Great doubt: great awakening. Little doubt: little awakening. No doubt: no awakening.” - Zen saying
A Question I’m Carrying
What question might have deepened today’s conversations, if I had dared to ask it?
With love, Vanessa
PS: If you missed my first Reflection edition, I explored three emerging shifts shaping how leadership is evolving. You can read it here for context on what’s rising in real conversations with executive leaders - and what’s coming next.
How smart of you to consider and giving more importance to the question than the answer content